Saturday, January 31, 2004

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Two sides to every story.
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If you cannot love; you must hate.
If you cannot create; you must destroy.

And so speaketh The Enlighted One.
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Friday, January 30, 2004

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And, of, and by.
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Of course I haven't forgot posting today! I just have nothing to say.
NOTHING.
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Thursday, January 29, 2004

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Weird, but interesting.
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THE SOCIETY FOR THE RECOVERY OF PERSONS APPARENTLY DEAD
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Tin Tin and Me (and some of my friends, and some of my French friends, and some of my english Friends, and Hergé and...)
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I went with the ole´ NSOP team and saw the film Tintin and Me by Danish director Anders Østergaard.
Quite a nice film, but like many other films about art it focuses on the personality of the artist and doesn't spend much time talking about the art. After seeing this film you know a lot about Hergé (Georges Remi, 1907-1983) who created Tin Tin, and of course the point of the film is that Tin Tin and the other characters in the books are projections of the personality of Hergé. You hear about his Right wing Catholic background, his blacklisting after WW II (because the Germans had taken control of the paper publishing Tin Tin) his divorce from his Catholic wife, his devotion to work and duty (which his publishers exploited to the fullest) etc, etc.
I think the best part was a short film clip of Hergé meeting Andy Warhol ("Uhm, er, uhm Yeah...er...") his realisation that his attempts at creating abstract art were futile and an awful TV show from the seventies celebrating the long awaited meeting between Herge and his "lost" Chinese friend Tchang-Tchung Sun whom he hadn’t seen for forty-five years. Tchang had met Herge in Brussels in their youth but returned to China in the turbulent 1930's. Reportedly Tchang changed Herge's petty racist views of the Chinese - typical of the time - and this led to the creation of the masterpiece The Blue Lotus where Tchang also drew the signs and posters in the backgrounds in authentic Chinese. Apparently the "reunion" of the two friends was turned into a marketing scoop for Hergés publishing house and in the TV studio both Hergé and Tchang - who had been flown in directly from Communist China - look somewhat embarrassed by the whole thing.

After seeing what made up Herge's life you fully understand why he spend most of his time crouching over his drawing board telling the tale of a young man who always stood up for good, rarely lost his temper, travelled the world- and the universe - and didn’t have a girlfriend or a job!

His great work of Art.
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Wednesday, January 28, 2004

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Heroic Huns™.
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Old readers from back in the NSOP days might remember "Männer im Uniform" my series of postings celebrating men smartly clad in uniforms and performing outdoor activities. I will now launch a new series called Heroic Huns™ focusing on the exploits of individuals in the German Armed forces 1939-45.
(Männer im uniform did exactly the same thing but we all need a change now and then, right?)

A good starting point is stealing from somebody else, so enjoy this cool link to The Tank destruction Badge.
These were awarded for the destruction of an enemy tank with a hand-held weapon. This usually ment: The Panzerfaust. As these weapons had a range between 30 to 100 meters it took a lot of courage to wait for a tank to get that close. Apart from that, Panzerfausts were massproduced mainly by a lamp firm and sometimes they exploded in peoples hands when fired. It was also the worlds first one-man (or woman) anti-tank weapon and later prototypes produced in 1945 formed the basis for the Russian RPG-2 and RPG-7, so often seen in the hands of Third World guerillas like this Taliban

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

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I´ve had it (once more)
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Fed up managing three jobs
Fed up answering stupid questons
Fed up right-wing government
Fed up no change.
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Sunday, January 25, 2004

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And the beat goes on.
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Missed posting yesterday, simply forgot, and I'm sorry about that because as we all know: It´s one posting PER DAY here at "don't ask me..."

Does that mean I will give you something extra today?

no.
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Friday, January 23, 2004

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Rolling, rolling, rolling.
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I saw Bowling For Columbine last night and it comes highly recommended. Of course it’s full of highlights like when Michael Moore walk off with the free gun he got at a local bank for opening a new account, or when he later casually buys ammunition at the local barbershop. Then comes the million $ question: A country like Great Britain has 68 killings every year from guns, a country like Germany has around 400 - America has: 11.125...Is it all down to gun control? Nay says Mr. Moore; because a country like Canada has 10 million families, and 7 million privately owned guns, and still their annual kill-ratio is only in the hundreds.
What is it then that makes Americans go out and shoot each other? - Violent Rock and Rap music?
Nay, says the king-of-rock´n-roll-your-parents-hate: Marilyn Manson, who also comes up with one of the best explanations for the carnage: In America you are constantly kept in a state of fear by TV commercials telling you that you are wrong, ugly, without sex appeal, etc. and the only way to relieve that fear is to BUY PRODUCTS! Running around in a state of paranoia all the time is a good reason for keeping plenty of firearms at home, and the bottom line in the film is that most of the blame for this goes to the American TV news which keep pounding its viewers with the fear of being mugged, raped, or the victims of a home invasion by hordes of black or Hispanic gangsters. With that kind of subhuman lunatics waiting to destroy your Family© you are considered irresponsible if you don't keep a flamethrower right next to the nursery.
On it goes with more stories about how the rich in America make money. It´s not by being inventive or enterprising, but simply by finding new ways of exploiting other Americans who are simply too poor to do anything about it, they are merely fodder for commercialism. When they run out of poor Americans, they go overseas.
Generally the film is a great example of a marriage of art and political activism, like in an ending scene where Moore shows up at the local K-Mart with two teenagers who survived the shooting at Columbine High. One is disabled and in a wheel chair, and both of them still have bullets in their bodies, bullets the shooters bought in the sports department at K-Mart. Miraculously the outcome - After the usual run of executives saying they will look into it, etc, etc - Is that K-Mart announces they will stop selling ammunition within 90 days.

After seeing a film like that you are glad to live in peaceful Denmark where the media did not create a false impression of hordes of immigrants coming here to take away The Welfare State™ and thus paved the way for the racism of The Danish Peoples Party.
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Thursday, January 22, 2004

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It´s one posting PER DAY here at "Don´t ask me..."
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A husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop, and with them are their
nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus
arrives, they discover it to be overloaded and only the wife and the
nine kids are able to board the bus.

So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while the
husband gets irritated by the ticking noise the stick makes as the blind
man taps it on the sidewalk and says to him:

"Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end your stick? That ticking
sound is driving me crazy! "

The blind man replies:

"If you'd put a rubber on the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding
the bus!"
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Wednesday, January 21, 2004

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Jewish Samurai.
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Back in the olden days when Samurai were important, there was a powerful Japanese Emperor who needed a new Chief Samurai. So he sent out a declaration throughout the entire known world of that time that he was searching for a CHIEF.   A year passed, but only 3 people applied for the very demanding position;
1. a Japanese Samurai
2. a Chinese Samurai
3. a Jewish Samurai  (You snicker!? It is, apparently, possible!)
The emperor asked the Japanese Samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be the chief Samurai. The Japanese Samurai opened a match box, and out popped a bumblebee. Whoosh! went his sword, and the bumblebee dropped dead on the ground.
The emperor exclaimed "That is very impressive!"
The emperor then issued the same challenge to the Chinese Samurai, to come in and demonstrate why he should be chosen. The Chinese samurai also opened a match box and out buzzed a fly. Whoosh, Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh! And the fly dropped dead on the ground in four small pieces.
The emperor exclaimed: "That is VERY impressive!"
Now the emperor turned to the Jewish Samurai, and asked him to demonstrate why he should be the Chief Samurai. The Jewish Samurai also opened a match box, and out flew a gnat.   His flashing sword went Whoosh!   But the gnat was still alive and flying around.
The emperor, obviously disappointed, said: "Very ambitious!, but why is that gnat not dead?"
The Jewish Samurai just smiled and said: "Circumcision is not meant to kill."

From : The Joke of the Day Archive
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DEFINITELY comes with a camera in it...(George Orwell died fifty-four years ago today)
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A funny and alternative view on what could have happened in "1984" - As we all know: If it´s operated by the state it doesn´t work very well, so how does that comply with a society where the state is supposed to have total control over its citizens? Reinventing Big Brother.
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It´s "star" with an extra "r"
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You haven't surfed the Web if you haven´t stopped by at: www.ringostarr.com
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Tuesday, January 20, 2004

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News flash: A feminist attack on The Manly World Of Man-Men™!
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This internet web-link address was supplied by one of our field officers working under cover:
Russian steel disgraced!
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Monday, January 19, 2004

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I just can´t help myself...
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After years of painstaking work, and a number of humiliating failures, The RAC tank museum at Bovington, England have restored their Tiger-1 to Full running order - sixty years after it left the factory, Impressive!
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Sunday, January 18, 2004

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A little game.
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How many F´s in this text? :

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE-
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIF-
IC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS


Read the answer Here

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Saturday, January 17, 2004

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You´re not getting MY vote.
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When not fullfilling my duties as part of D.W.C.C.W.S (The Danish Working Community for the Continuation Of The Welfare State) I spend most of my time recovering from those duties.
In my case that´s mostly divided between three things:

Smoking joints
Watching pornography
Reading books about Nazi-Germany


and sometimes I do the shopping...

The interesting thing here is not the sociological and psychological implementations of a thirty-something failed artist and academic who retreats from reality to dwell in a Never-land of pre-adolescent imagery and nob rubbing - No, the interesting part is that this behaviour places me in a funny situation politically :

-The Right wing thinks I’m a bad person because I’m using an illegal drug.
-The Left wing thinks I’m a bad person because I participate in the exploitation of women.
-They both think I’m a bad person because I have unsavoury interests in a politically un-correct subject.

Do I need politicians who are not working for but against my interests?
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Friday, January 16, 2004

Thursday, January 15, 2004

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My old cellphone stopped working so now I´m the proud owner of The Alcatel 735

Yes -It comes with a camera in it...
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A day in the life.
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Heinrich Mueller (Gestapo Mueller)

Heinrich Mueller was the head of the infamous Gestapo 1935-45. Gestapo meant GEheimes STAats POlizei - "Secret State Police" and was roughly the Third Reich Equivalent of the KGB or the CIA. Gestapo investigated, jailed, tortured - and often eliminated - political enemies of The Third Reich. During WW II all countries occupied by Nazi forces would have several branches of the Gestapo working at infiltrating and destroying the local resistance.
Heinrich Mueller was born into a poor Catholic family in Bavaria in 1901. He fought in WW I and after the war worked for the Bavarian police tracking down and informing about local Communists.
When he later was appointed head of the Gestapo by Reinhardt Heydrich (head of the Reichs Sicherheits Hauptamt - The police above all other police in The Third Reich) he became one of the most high-ranking members of the SS and one of only fifteen people who, along with Eichmann and Heydrich, attended the Wannsee-conference in 1942 where the elimination of all European Jews was planned.
When The Third Reich reached its end in 1945 Mueller mysteriously disappeared and has not been seen or heard of since. As one of the top-level employees of the Nazi-state and responsible for the jailing, torture and death of thousands of people he was of course much sought after by the War Crimes Commission and since his disappearance several rumours have existed about his fate.

1) He visited Hitler in the Fuehrer-bunker in Berlin two days before Hitler committed suicide and possibly died leaving Berlin just like Martin Bormann, another top-Nazi last seen in Berlin and believed to have survived the war until a DNA-analysis of excavated bone fragments proved he had died in the fighting.

2) He committed suicide in April 1945, realising that the end had come and he would probably be sentenced to hang for his activities.

3) He was captured by the Russians and put to work by the KGB organising national security in Czechoslovakia.

4) He was captured by the Americans and put to work by the CIA who wanted expert knowledge on how to fight Communism.

A sensational book claiming he lived in Washington from 1948-52 is reviewed (claiming it’s all a fraud) Here, and an analysis of recently declassified documents from the CIA themselves can be read Here.

Old Nazi junk? Who really cares? - Well, it’s one posting PER DAY here at Don’t Ask Me..!

(BTW: The review of the book is from “The Journal of Historical Review” who are themselves active in claiming the Holocaust was a fraud created by the Allies after the war…)
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Tuesday, January 13, 2004

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Loner, moi?
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Received this in my mail:

Hello lennardg,

We at Wehrmacht-Awards.com Militaria Forums would like to wish you a happy
birthday today!


Nice forum by the way, you wouldn´t believe what private collectors have stashed away in basements and attics.


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Have you had your Weetabix?
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I saw a great TV programme on Danish TV2 yesterday (no, I'm not making this up: TV2, Danish, TV, great) it was sort of the history of Britpop told by the participants themselves (Blur, Oasis, Pulp etc) Really good programme dealing with the many facets of Great Britain in the nineties. One thing that launched the whole Britpop thing, and it's equivalent in the artworld - YBA's - Young British Artists - Was the optimism coming from the end of Margaret Thatcher's eleven years of conservative government. Of course all the well meaning artists and musicians ended up being screwed by the social-liberalism of Tony Blair while nose-diving in cocaine, fame and money. But still - What a ride!
I also realised that here in Denmark we are actually at the other end of the rope (pun intended...) we have just begun our long journey into the darkness but one day we wil hopefully see the end of neo-liberalism and the party can begin (and when we have wasted it all once more the neo-liberals will be re-elected to come and clean up after us again)
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Bombs away, birthday boy.
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Today is my 38'th birthday (there, todays posting is taken care of!)
well, what to say about it? thirty-eight years... - That means I've got thirty years left in the claws of the opressive fascist capitalist regime (=I have to go to a job every day)
Hmm, no kids, no wife, no career, but a good apartment, a nice bicycle and plenty of debt. There were times when I wanted to leap out of the window, there were times when I had it all and blew it, there were times when....well no point in going on about it, I'm off to Other men who can't seem to grow up but who know how to have a good time while being creative and tonight I'll finish setting up the Powermac G4 I bought second hand last weekend!

Monday, January 12, 2004

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Rants from the refectory.
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Well, it´s one posting PER DAY here at don´t ask...so I´ll have to come up with something...
er...uhm...well the title is a joke on a book by Charles Bukowsky called "Screams From The Balcony"
and that´s all I could come up with.
A link
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Sunday, January 11, 2004

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Culled from my extensive fan mail: (I´ve always liked that word - culled - soooo cheasy)
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Stuart, another blogger who for some reason is still reading this blog (possibly alcoholism) inspired me to another version of "the grip on life" :

Sad? lonely? depressed?
- Get a gripe on your life!
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Saturday, January 10, 2004

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Plans for Nigel.
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No more pussy footing! From now on this blog will have dayly postings!
It is my sworn duty to kick ass and tell the tale of the urban loner and his quest for self-gratification.
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"I believe in the power of American natives"
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- I might not have a grip on life -But what about a grope?
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Tuesday, January 06, 2004

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Food for thought?
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"If you aren't outraged,
you haven't been paying attention..."

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Planning ahead
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All is quiet on the blogfront you say? Has he finally joined that pro-creation cult in the Andes? Did a SWAT-team pump him full of lead when he tried to escape the cruel injustice of the fascist state apparatus?
NO! NO! NO! - I have of course been busy making plans for 2004:

1)"Ya gotta have wheels..."
In 2002-3 I flunked getting a drivers license THREE times - This year I will burn rubber or...try again next year.

2)"Everybody says: I’ve seen that on TV..."
I also want to watch Eric Kamen play a white piano on VH1! As a concerned citizen it is my duty to watch assorted wars on CNN! Why can’t I enjoy endless reruns of surplus 1950´s Hollywood dribble on TCM? Why am I denied access to game shows from Germany run by people named Zansi or Herbert? Why can’t I order (directly, and only on TV) the Tannerizer™, the Hipporizer™, the Buttster™ or the CrackBulger-II™?
In short: I’m upgrading to the FULL cable-TV-package-facillity-installment-solution!

3) If they DO decide to close down Christiania I will immigrate to that land of freedom where a man can still walk tall, marry his childhood sweetheart and have a dream to believe in: Sweden.

4) I should consider getting the bike fixed; front wheel is getting a bit wobbly.

5) No more sex with rodents - You gotta live and let live...

6) Remind myself to ALLWAYS keep the headlights turned off and the shotgun sawed off.

7) That’s about it, I guess...see you next year.
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